Mismatched Lovers

Published:  February 1st, 1979

Harold and Maude

By: Colin Higgins

Avon Books

ISBN-13:  9780380003853

Nineteen-year-old Harold Chasen is obsessed with death.  He fakes suicides to shock his self-obsessed mother, drives a customized Jaguar hearse, and attends funerals of complete strangers.  Seventy-nine-year-old Maude Chardin, on the other hand, adores life.  She liberates trees from city sidewalks and transplants them to the forest, paints smiles on the faces of church statues, and "borrows" cars to remind their owners life is fleeting -- here today, gone tomorrow!  A chance meeting between the two turns into a madcap, whirlwind romance, and Harold learns that life is worth living.

Review

       Ugh.  I know this is a classic, and I have a couple friends that absolutely loved it.  Maybe it also doesn't help my opinion that I've never seen the movie?  Not sure, but for some reason I'm not at all a fan of this one.  It was okay, but overall un-inspiring for me personally.

       I found it to be kind of similar to Love Story, in the fact that you can totally tell it was written to be a screenplay.  It was never written to just be a book and for me personally, that hurt my enjoyment of it.  There was no real flesh to the characters and barely any plot happening.  And that freaking ending...

       Since when is that the freaking answer?  Maybe if I had seen the movie, or read this as a teenager, I'd have had more tolerance for the whole "suicide-star-crossed-age-gap-lovers" thing.  But get this: I just didn't.  She could have just told him, "Hey yo, I'm way too freaking old for you.  Find a nice girl your own age and P.S. I'm going off on further adventures."  Instead she committs suicide and Harold learns a nice, neat lesson?  FUCKING GAG ME.

VERDICT:  2/5  Stars

*I received this book from Avon Books on NetGalley.  No favors or money were exchanged for this review.  This book was originally published on February 1st, 1979.*

Too Much Cake Isn't Good For You

Published:  September 15th, 2013

Cake

By: Lauren Dane

Harlequin

ASIN:  B00D45018E

She won’t be satisfied with just one bite...

Art student-slash-bike messenger Wren Davis pursues what she wants. And what she wants now is Gregori Ivanov, rock star of the Seattle art scene. With his tattoos, piercings and sensual sneer, Gregori is the ultimate bad boy. Wren’s gotten to know the man beneath the body art, too—and it only makes her crave him more.

But Gregori loves women like he loves cake and champagne—intensely, but only for the moment. And after Wren experiences just how scorching sex with Gregori is, she’s determined to show him that just one taste won’t be enough...

Review

     Wren Davis has been working as a bike messenger just to make some extra cash while she's in art school.  While on her rounds she meets and becomes friends with famous artist Gregori Ivanov, who has a bit of  a reputation.  Wren decides she wants nothing else more than Gregori, but first she needs to get him to leave behind all the women who burned him in the past - namely his crazy ex-wife who always comes crawling back again.  Can Wren get Gregori to give a relationship with her a chance, or will all they ever shared just amount to tea times and fond memories?

     I honestly never saw the attraction of Gregori in this book.  He's got tattoos, piercings and a mohawk.  He's oh-so misunderstood.  Give me a break!  I did like Wren who seemed very self-assured, but after awhile her inhuman confidence got on my nerves.  It seemed a little like she never had any doubts about herself.  Gregori was the opposite and despite being a famous artist had zero confidence in his relationships.  I would have liked to see more interaction between Wren and her roommates/friends Kelsey & Lindsey.  I felt like their relationship was more interesting to me than the "romance" between Gregori and Wren.  To me the whole famous artist and student dynamic came off different from anything I've read before, but only because Wren wasn't the cliched bubbly ingenue.  I don't know, something about this novella just felt really forced to me and the third person narrative was used in a way that kept the characters at a distance from me as a reader.  I just didn't connect and though it was well-written for a novella, it still wasn't the best I've ever read.  Overall, I wouldn't even recommend it to anyone honestly because I wasn't a very big fan of the story and over $3 is a bit much for a novella that isn't even 100 pages.

VERDICT:  2.5/5  Stars

*I received an Advanced Reading E-book Copy from the publisher, via NetGalley.  No money or favors were exchanged for this review.  This book was published September 15th, 2013.*

I'd Rather Be Castaway With A Beach Ball

Published:  August 16th, 2012
On The Island
By: Tracy Garvis Graves
Penguin
ISBN-13:  9781405910217

When thirty-year-old English teacher Anna Emerson is offered a job tutoring T.J. Callahan at his family's summer rental in the Maldives, she accepts without hesitation; a working vacation on a tropical island trumps the library any day.

T.J. Callahan has no desire to leave town, not that anyone asked him. He's almost seventeen and if having cancer wasn't bad enough, now he has to spend his first summer in remission with his family - and a stack of overdue assignments - instead of his friends.

Anna and T.J. are en route to join T.J.'s family in the Maldives when the pilot of their seaplane suffers a fatal heart attack and crash-lands in the Indian Ocean. Adrift in shark-infested waters, their life jackets keep them afloat until they make it to the shore of an uninhabited island. Now Anna and T.J. just want to survive and they must work together to obtain water, food, fire, and shelter.

Their basic needs might be met but as the days turn to weeks, and then months, the castaways encounter plenty of other obstacles, including violent tropical storms, the many dangers lurking in the sea, and the possibility that T.J.'s cancer could return. As T.J. celebrates yet another birthday on the island, Anna begins to wonder if the biggest challenge of all might be living with a boy who is gradually becoming a man.

Review

 

     There seems to be something about taking people from modern time periods and dropping them onto a deserted island to fend for themselves that takes the fun right out of it.  I don't know about you guys, but I'm such a fan of Swiss Family Robinson castaway types - the ones who make the most out of the situation by finding the fun and excitement in it.  Or at least have them be like the Blue Lagoon castaways, where everyday is a new discovery about life itself while living in an island paradise, away from the taint of civilization.  What I got was a 30 year old schoolteacher, desperate for a family of her own, plus on the verge of breaking it off with her dead-end boyfriend and her sixteen year old student, who is spending his summer recovering from cancer and catching up on schoolwork - at least until they get stranded on an island in the middle of nowhere when their pilot has a heart attack.  Every day is just a struggle to stay alive, with food, water, fire and shelter being the prime concerns.  But after a few years on the island, Anna and T.J. begin to fall in love with each other and start to imagine a life with each other off the island. 

     Anna was a decent character, but even with the emotional monologues and personal issues, I never felt like I really knew what she was going through.  And her know-it-all attempts to tell T.J. what's best for him really got on my nerves.  He's old enough to have sex with her, but T.J. isn't old enough to decide he's in love with her?  Bitch, please!  Also, the only feeling I did ever get off of her was completely ambivalent and she had no personality to me as a reader: insert placeholder HERE.  Yes, this book was fairly true to life.  But honestly speaking, and this is something you will never hear me say about ANY other genre, I much prefer my castaway/island stories to be unrealistic and fun!  The slow build of romance over time after friendship, and all of the realistic survival issues made boring (at least to me) converged to make me feel like this book was really repetitive and not all that interesting.  I felt like 2/3 of the book was them eating, swimming, or missing a plane/dreaming of life off the island.  The almost PTSD actions of both of them once they were off the island only made the book even more depressing, until a last minute turnaround which made me roll my eyes and smile.  Overall, I recommend it to lovers of chick lit who like the more maudlin aspects of being castaway.  But for those who want old style adventure, or classically epic romance this is not the book for you.  At least if you're anything like me at all.

 

VERDICT:  2.5/5  Stars

 

**No money or favors were exchanged for this review. This book is now available in stores, online, or maybe even at your local library.**

Love Has A Sell By Date

Published: December 11th, 2012 (first published August 1st, 2010)
Love and Other Perishable Items (Original published as, 'Good Oil')
By: Laura Buzo
Knopf Books for Young Readers
ISBN-13: 9780375970009

Love is awkward, Amelia should know.

From the moment she sets eyes on Chris, she is a goner. Lost. Sunk. Head over heels infatuated with him. It's problematic, since Chris, 21, is a sophisticated university student, while Amelia, is 15.

Amelia isn't stupid. She knows it's not gonna happen. So she plays it cool around Chris—at least, as cool as she can. Working checkout together at the local supermarket, they strike up a friendship: swapping life stories, bantering about everything from classic books to B movies, and cataloging the many injustices of growing up. As time goes on, Amelia's crush doesn't seem so one-sided anymore. But if Chris likes her back, what then? Can two people in such different places in life really be together?

Through a year of befuddling firsts—first love, first job, first party, and first hangover—debut author Laura Buzo shows how the things that break your heart can still crack you up.

Review

     So, I'm just going to dive right into this one, starting with the different covers of this book.  The first one if for the German edition and I think it's beautiful.  It doesn't really represent the book accurately though.  The second cover was the original one from Australia and it annoys me.  That cover model looks NOTHING like the main character of the book!  Nothing at all!  And she also looks like she's a college student and if Amelia was one, there wouldn't be a book most likely.  The third is the American cover, which also has a new title for the book itself.  I like the new title and the cover fits it very well - plus it latches onto the story nicely as the two main characters work in a grocery store.  So for once the American reprint has the better cover in my opinion - how the Hell did that happen?  I went into this one not knowing what to expect exactly.  I am not normally a fan of YA Aussie Lit.  Usually it just doesn't register the same way with me that the U.S. and British YA (and even then only sometimes for the latter, not always) do.  It's probably because I don't get the slang and I am lazy and picky about stuff like that.  The 'romance' between Amelia and Chris was taboo for a reason.  What college student in his right mind would date a fifteen year old?  What could they possibly have in common after all, other than sharing the same job?  Yes, Amelia reminds Chris of his youth and a younger version of himself, but for most of the book he comes across as a very outgoing, friendly, pathetic drunkard who is wasting his life aimlessly.  He goes to university, but obviously only does it because he 'should' and not cause he has any real desire to do so.  Amelia's friend, has it right in the end that she shouldn't wait for him.  

     I liked Amelia a lot as a character.  She was smart, funny and very innocent (but not in the annoying, Mary-Sueish way a  lot of YA heroines are).  But the sticking point on me loving her was her lack of common sense when it came to Chris.  First love or not (debatable), Amelia put herself in some majorly stupid situations to fit in with his friends and be more like a girl he'd want.  The alternating narrative between Chris and Amelia gives extra insight into each of their reasoning for pursuing/not pursuing the other.  I still disliked Chris by the end and found him to be morally lacking, and devoid of swoon.  But maybe a relationship between a fifteen year old and a twenty-two year old just squicks me out.  Overall, a good read and the ending was realistic in a good way.  It was a very well-written and thought out novel.  As a coming of age story, it's definitely a win.   But not one I'd recommend for everyone and it won't be a re-read.

VERDICT:  3.75/5  Stars

*I received an Advanced Reading E-book Copy from the publisher, via NetGalley. No money or favors were exchanged for this review. This book was published in the U.S. on December 11th, 2012.*