There Is No Dog
By: Meg Rosoff
Penguin Group USA, Inc.
Meet your unforgettable protagonist: God, who, as it turns out, is a 19-year-old boy living in the present-day and sharing an apartment with his long-suffering fifty-something personal assistant. Unfortunately for the planet, God is lazy and, frankly, hopeless. He created all of the world's species in six days because he couldn't summon the energy to work for longer. He gets Africa and America mixed up. And his beleagured assistant has his work cut out for him when God creates a near-apolcalyptic flood, having fallen asleep without turning the bath off. There is No Dog is a darkly funny novel from one of our most delightfully unpredictable writers.
In the beginning there was God, a horny and spoiled nineteen year old being who was given free reign over Earth. He created man in his image, which really explains a lot. Then he pretty much abandoned them except for his tendency to inappropriately fall in love and cause apocalyptic weather conditions when it doesn't go his way. This time God's assistant Mr. B has his work cut out for him, when he falls for Lucy a human zookeeper. Also, Bob is dealing with his gambling addicted Mother, Mona who has gambled away his pet Eck (the last of it's species). Bob wants it back, but only because it's his Eck, not because he actually values its worth. This book just seemed like it would be such a fun satire about the unanswered questions of religion. In the end, all it managed to do was depress me even further about the meaning of life and mankind's creation. God being a teenage boy who just lusts, eats and plays video games all the time makes sense unfortunately. I felt truly sorry for the beleagured Bob and his creation, the whales (who are having major habitat pollution problems thanks to God's idiocy). I didn't particularly like Lucy, as she was portrayed as being too perfect to relate to. I liked Eck and the daughter of the man who won him from Mona, named Estelle, who wanted to find a way to save him from being eaten by her Father. The book seemed disjointed, like it forgot it's prupose midway through and no longer knew how to follow through with a cohesive plot resolution. Not one I would recommend to anyone except perhaps an athiest (and there's a chance even they might not like it). I love the author's book How I Live Now, so this was doubly disappointing for me.
VERDICT: 1.5/5 Stars
*No money or favors were exchanged for this review. This book is now available in stores and online.*