Witch Rhymes With.....

Published:  June 10th, 2014

Hexed (The Witch Hunter #1)

By: Michelle Krys

Delacorte Press

ISBN-13:  9780385743372

If high school is all about social status, Indigo Blackwood has it made.  Sure, her quirky mom owns an occult shop, and a nerd just won't stop trying to be her friend, but Indie is a popular cheerleader with a football-star boyfriend and a social circle powerful enough to ruin everyone at school.  Who wouldn't want to be her?

Then a guy dies right before her eyes.  And the dusty old family Bible her mom is freakishly possessive of is stolen.  But it's when a frustratingly sexy stranger named Bishop enters Indie's world that she learns her destiny involves a lot more than pom-poms and parties.  If she doesn't get the Bible back, every witch on the planet will die.  And that's seriously bad news for Indie, because according to Bishop, she's a witch too.

Suddenly forced into a centuries-old war between witches and sorcerers, Indie's about to uncover the many dark truths about her life -- and a future unlike any she ever imagined on top of the cheer pyramid.

Review

     This book started out weird, but it had some potential.  The main character, Indigo "Indie" Blackwood, is a beautiful, popular high school cheerleader.  Her biggest problem right now is her competitive frenemy Bianca, who may or may not be attempting to steal Indie's hot footballer boyfriend, Devon.  So when some guy seemingly kills himself and Indie witnesses it, things begin to fall out of wack.  He's holding a paper with the address of Indie's family occult shop on it.  But it doesn't mean anything, right?  Then the family Bible is stolen, and it's up to Indie to retrieve it before there are horrific consequences - like end of the world-type consequences!  It turns out that the Bible holds the key to killing witches, and the sorcerers they are at war with would like nothing more than to unlock the secrets.  Since Indie is apparently a witch, it could be her own life on the line.  With the help of Bishop, a hot and mysterious member of "the Family" (the main Witch community heads of power), and her nerdy neighbor Paige, it's up to Indie to save what's left of her family, her own life and the rest of her race.  Can the three of them do it before it's too late?

     Obvious issues with it, but it doesn't sound like it could be all that bad, right?  WRONG!!!  What starts out with the basic threads to lead into a coherent and more detailed plot, devolves into a complete and total train wreck.  Indie herself displays almost constant stupidity after finding out about the reality of magic, witches and the evil sorcerers after the family Bible and by association, her.  She keeps rushing headlong into dangerous and intense situations, under the guise of stubbornness when really she's just too dumb to reason out a better solution.  Both of the guys Indie is involved with are sexist, asshole pigs.  Devon cheats on her with her "best" friend Bianca, and then has the gall to ask her to go to Homecoming with him, just because they already had plans!  And Bishop, the "mysterious" bad-boy type, is a dickwad to Indie.  He basically talks circles around her, neglects to actually explain anything about being a witch and makes fun of her at every opportunity he gets (for being a cheerleader, her clothes, the way she talks, even the girl her boyfriend chooses over her).  And this d-bag is someone I'm supposed to like?  Not mention his tattoo of naked Betty Boop on his neck.  What a f**king pervert.  The love triangle later on with a girl named JEZEBEL (yes, you read that right! NO SUBTLETY!) just worsens my opinion of all these characters, if you can even call them that.

      The battles with the sorcerer henchmen are a pathetic cluster fuck, and even the scene when SPOILER Indie's mom is put into a movie screen and killed by a savage tiger SPOILER was more of a WTF confusion moment than anything else.  The mythology of the witches was convoluted and attempted some genealogical, DNA explanation that made about zero sense to me (not that I'm all that scientifically knowledgeable - but my 10th grade Bio education calls bullshit on this one).  Also, the revelations about her Mom's witch status and her irresponsible Aunt Penny's, made no sense in the context they were used.  The fact of what Aunt Penny was hiding made no sense - unless she's evil.  Probably what will happen in the next book.  Not to mention, "Hey guys, I know you've been looking for the SPESHUL BIBLE THINGY but it's an EFFING DECOY!!!  The only character I didn't want to drop kick in this book was Paige, who was way too nice to Indie, who was obviously using her for her own gain.  And also, a fucking Jay-Z concert?  Why not just a freaking dinner-movie date?  Or something that was, y'know, in the realm of actual believability?  I'm going to stop here, although the scenes with the magic and their pitiful plotting and description (i.e. next to none) take the cake.  I am only marking this as high as I am because of the fact that I finished it.  Won't be torturing myself further.

VERDICT:  1/5  Stars

**I  received this book from Delacorte Books, on NetGalley.  No favors or money were exchanged for this review.  This book was published June 10th, 2014.**

A Tale of Ladies and Kitchen Maids

Expected Publication:  January 28th, 2014

Manor of Secrets

By: Katherine Longshore

Point

ISBN-13:  9780545567589

The year is 1911.  And at The Manor, nothing is as it seems...

Lady Charlotte Edmonds: Beautiful, wealthy, and sheltered, Charlotte feels suffocated by the strictures of upper-crust society.  She longs to see the world beyond The Manor, to seek out high adventure.  And most of all, romance.

Janie Seward: Fiery, hardworking, and clever, Janie knows she can be more than just a kitchen maid.  But she isn't sure she possesses the courage -- or the means -- to break free and follow her passions.

Both Charlotte and Janie are ready for a change.  As their paths overlap in the gilded hallways and dark corridors of The Manor, rules are broken and secrets are revealed.  Secrets that will alter the course of their lives...forever.

Review

     Lady Charlotte Edmonds is still very young and full of dreams, even if she does know pretty much exactly how her life will turn out.  She will be married, take her place in society and slowly become nothing in the eyes of the world, except for an addition to her husband (who she probably won't choose or love of her own accord either).  Charlotte wants nothing more than to break free, see the world and fall in love with someone of her decision.  Janie Seward is a kitchen maid at the Manor and has known hunger, tragedy and injustice.  But she has a fiery spirit and something very important: freedom from societal expectations.  All Janie wants though is to have a stable place at The Manor, and somewhere to belong.  She's too afraid to even dare to dream of going beyond her current station in life.  When Charlotte and Janie collide into each others' daily lives, it's all they can do to hang on for dear life.  Secrets long since buried come to light and the girls find out they have more than they ever thought possible in common.  Can they help one another rise above the mistakes of the past and into a brave new future together, that they can be excited for?

      This book was basically like Downton Abbey for a younger audience, with less emotional and character depths.  In Charlotte and Janie we have two of the normal stereotypes of the time period (early 1900s): the privileged lady and the kitchen maid.  That said, I did appreciate Charlotte's desperate want for something more and freedom to make her own choices.  She was realistically drawn in the sense that Charlotte has no real concept of the way the world works.  When she toys with the idea of an affair with a young servant named Laurence, Charlotte doesn't realize that it could end in ruination for her or at the least dismissal for him.  And his dismissal (along with the reasons for it) would lead to never being hired in another grand house.  Thus, a career and established life have been destroyed by fleeting fancy.  Also, the idea that Charlotte was at first appalled by the idea of Lord Andrew Broadhurst, because he was the one who her Mother wanted her to marry, and later actually liked him once she got to know him was wonderful.  He wasn't a disposable, one-dimensional boring moron (or evil jerk) like a lot of historical fiction love interests turn out to be.  Instead Laurence was a womanizing jerk!  It would have been so easy to go in the other direction for the sake of romanticizing and I applaud Longshore for not doing it.

     Janie on the other hand, was just as realistic in different ways.  She had such an uncertain childhood, that all she wants is to belong at the Manor and have nothing change ever again.  The interpolitics and hierarchy of the household servants, upstairs and downstairs, was well played.  I especially liked the fact that even with her Mom as the head cook, Janie was still treated as something of an outsider by the other servants, except her best friend Harry, the hall-boy.  Janie is up to taking small risks and dares that don't cause any real upheaval in her life, but she doesn't want adventure like Charlotte.  She just wants stability, even though she dreams of running her own kitchen.  When Charlotte's long-lost Aunt Beatrice comes to The Manor and brings an astounding secret with her, Charlotte will do anything to uncover it.  So enlisting the help of Jenny, and causing more trouble than either of them imagined (upstairs and downstairs), the girls set out to find the truth.  In the process they become pretty good friends and learn that the grass isn't always greener.  I have to say though, the secret of Beatrice's was extremely predictable and I feel only younger readers might be fooled into any modicum of surprise.  I have to say that I was expecting the secret to encompass Janie as well (which it did), just not in quite the way it did.  With no obvious plans for this to be a series, I am also disappointed in the very open ending.  We are left with next to no resolution for Janie or Charlotte.  That said, while I overall enjoyed the book, I wouldn't be continuing in the even of another anyhow.  I recommend this if you're in need of a early 1900s class study fix, or some lite Downton Abbey to tide you over.  Maybe a good intro to fluffy historical fiction for younger teens as well.

VERDICT:  3/5  Stars

*I received this book as part of Around the World ARC Tours, run by the lovely Princess Bookie & also from Scholastic on NetGalley.  No favors or money were exchanged for this review.  This book's expected publication date is January 28th, 2014.*

No Chains To Oppress Me

Published:  May 14th, 2013

The Caged Graves

By: Dianne K. Salerni

Clarion Books

ISBN-13:  9780547868530

17-year-old Verity Boone expects a warm homecoming when she returns to Catawissa, Pennsylvania, in 1867, pledged to marry a man she has never met. Instead, she finds a father she barely knows and a future husband with whom she apparently has nothing in common. One truly horrifying surprise awaits her: the graves of her mother and aunt are enclosed in iron cages outside the local cemetery. Nobody in town will explain why, but Verity hears rumors of buried treasure and witchcraft. Perhaps the cages were built to keep grave robbers out . . . or to keep the women in. Determined to understand, Verity finds  herself in a life-and-death struggle with people she trusted.

Inspired by a pair of real caged graves in present-day Catawissa, this historical YA novel weaves mystery, romance, and action into a suspenseful drama with human greed and passion at its core.

Review

     Verity Boone has spent the majority of her life living with her Aunt, Uncle and cousins and now that she is 17 years old her Father finally wants to bring her home.  After corresponding with Nathaniel, a young man she has never met but who her Father approves of, Verity becomes engaged and travels back to Catawissa, Pennsylvania, the place where she was born.  Her Father is always out in the fields and she never sees him.  Plus Nate, her fiance, seems like a completely different person than the man she got to know through his letters.  Feeling alone and unwanted, Verity latches onto a mystery surrounding her Mother and Aunt - and why their graves are caged in and outside of the cemetery's consecrated ground.  Discovering her Mother's diaries only gives Verity more questions, even when it looks like no one is going to answer her.  With whispers of witchcraft and legends of buried treasure, things quickly escalate into a deadly situation in which Verity may not make it out alive.  Can she solve the mystery, get her Mother and Aunt moved into the cemetery where they belong and figure out where her heart truly lies before it's too late?

     I was expecting some tame historical fiction novel, with an easily solved mystery thrown in.  What I got instead was a truly suspenseful tale of Revolutionary War treasure, murder and intrigue in a small town in Pennsylvania.  I liked Verity a decent amount and thought she was definitely a catalyst for interesting events.  But I got annoyed with her indecision in regards to Nate, who she literally drops everything for at the beginning of the novel and decides to marry sight-unseen.  She chooses to make some snap judgments about his real personality and starts flirting with the Doctor's apprentice Hadley (because he pays her more attention).  I liked Nate and thought that she was way too harsh on him for not being her exact ideal.  Their romance when she starts to realize how wrong she's been though is super cute.  I loved the mystery aspect of this novel.  It's centered around Verity's love for her Mother, and her inability to let the past go - but in a good way.  She's questioning things that everyone else has just accepted, all to honor her Mother's legacy.  The revelation of what really happened was believable, heartbreaking and freaked me out, all at once!  I won't say anymore cause I don't want to ruin the progression of the mystery as it unfolds, but it won't be at all what you're expecting.  

     The sideline story with the 'lost' treasure fit into the plot nicely and gave more action to the story that wouldn't have been there otherwise.   My favorite relationships in this book though weren't the romantic ones.  I loved the interactions between Beulah (the housekeeper) and Verity, they were so entertaining as they battled for kitchen control!  I also liked how easily and happily she interacted with Nate's older sisters, who welcomed her with open arms.  But the sweetest relationship for me was the awkward, but loving one between Verity and her Father, who has no idea how to really connect with his almost grown daughter.  Their connection and it's gentle awkwardness was sweet and convincing.  I liked that Salerni didn't make them get along and be super close automatically.  It's a very true-to-life relationship, which I appreciate as a reader.  I did like the fact that the author got the idea for the caged graves from real life, it made the mystery that much more interesting and her attention to historical detail and accuracy made me super happy.  Overall this was different from any book that I've read recently, especially my other historical fiction reads.  I truly enjoyed it, the book was well written and engaging with only some minor flaws that barely proved a distraction.  I'd highly recommend it.

VERDICT:  4.5/5  Stars

*I received an Advanced Reading E-book Copy from the publisher, via NetGalley. No money or favors were exchanged for this review. This book was published on May 14th, 2013.*

The Wishing Spell (The Land of Stories # 1) by: Chris Colfer

Published: July 17th, 2012

The Wishing Spell (The Land of Stories # 1)

Written By: Chris Colfer, Illustrated by: Brandon Dorman

Little, Brown Young Readers

ISBN-13:  9780316201575

Alex and Conner Bailey’s world is about to change, in this fast-paced adventure that uniquely combines our modern day world with the enchanting realm of classic fairytales.

The Land of Stories tells the tale of twins Alex and Conner. Through the mysterious powers of a cherished book of stories, they leave their world behind and find themselves in a foreign land full of wonder and magic where they come face-to-face with the fairy tale characters they grew up reading about.

But after a series of encounters with witches, wolves, goblins, and trolls alike, getting back home is going to be harder than they thought.

Review

   Twins Alex and Conner Bailey are having a rough time since they lost their Dad.  As much as they're trying to do their best, Conner is falling asleep in class and getting in trouble and Alex is retreating even further into herself and her books.  When their Mom has to work on their twelfth birthday, their Grandma comes to stay the night with them and celebrate.  She brings their childhood storybook, The Land of Stories, with her to give to them as a present.  Alex is especially excited, until the book starts reacting weirdly to her.  Determined to explain it through science, Alex begins investigating.  But when Conner confronts her and they both  fall INTO the book, they have bigger problems than who was right or wrong.  Such as the fact that magic is real in this world and so are fairy tales.  But things aren't like our world thinks they are and the twins have to deal with homicidal witches, gangs of wolves and a Frog-man who may be hiding something important.  And when their only way home might be something called the Wishing Spell, Alex and Conner must race to beat the Evil Queen to the ingredients so they can return home.  Will they be stuck in the Land of Stories for good, or will they make it back to their Mom?  Are the twins connected to the magical world even more than they know?  And why does the Evil Queen need the wishing spell?  This was definitely an interesting book.  I didn't even realize until I read the author bio that it was written by the guy who is Kurt on Glee.  I just picked it up because of the major fairy tale elements involved in it.  Goldilocks is a fugitive, Red Riding Hood is vain nitwit whose Grandma runs her kingdom which is being terrorized by a vicious pack of wolves, there are three King Charmings (brothers) and Snow White's stepmother, the Evil Queen, has escaped from the dungeon.  Oh yeah, and there's a frog-man who used to be a Prince! :)  I thought it was fun that Colfer explained the multiple Prince Charmings (Snow White's, Sleeping Beauty's, and Cinderella's) as being brothers.  The hardships the characters faced after their happily ever afters are spotlighted and it makes them more realistic as characters, more fleshed out than in the original stories.  I absolutely fell in love with the Evil Queen's backstory and thought it was wonderful!  I liked the quest the twins went on and thought the plot was well-paced and had a good, cohesive beginning and ending.  Alex is a smart, bookworm know it all, whose starstruck emotions at seeing the fairy tale characters I could identify with.  Conner is a sarcastic, wisecracking kid who is insecure about his lack of book-smarts, but knows a lot more common sense then his sister.  They were very well-drawn characters for such a short book.  The twist that connected Goldilocks, Red Riding Hood and Jack (from the Jack & the Beanstalk story) was absolute genius.  But this book was very middle grade, which means that it was quite below my reading level and not my normal reading material.  I liked it, but it was overly simplistic at certain points and it did just make me a little more ambivalent than I might have been.  The family revelation that the twins discovered wasn't completely unexpected, but it was well written.  I am curious to read the next book in the series and I truly enjoyed this one very much.  I would recommend it to readers who love fairy tales and don't mind reading middle-grade fiction.

VERDICT:  3.95/5  Stars

*I received this book as part of Around the World ARC Tours, run by the lovely Princess Bookie. No favors or money were exchanged for this review.   This book became available for purchase on July 17th, 2012.*