Witch Rhymes With.....

Published:  June 10th, 2014

Hexed (The Witch Hunter #1)

By: Michelle Krys

Delacorte Press

ISBN-13:  9780385743372

If high school is all about social status, Indigo Blackwood has it made.  Sure, her quirky mom owns an occult shop, and a nerd just won't stop trying to be her friend, but Indie is a popular cheerleader with a football-star boyfriend and a social circle powerful enough to ruin everyone at school.  Who wouldn't want to be her?

Then a guy dies right before her eyes.  And the dusty old family Bible her mom is freakishly possessive of is stolen.  But it's when a frustratingly sexy stranger named Bishop enters Indie's world that she learns her destiny involves a lot more than pom-poms and parties.  If she doesn't get the Bible back, every witch on the planet will die.  And that's seriously bad news for Indie, because according to Bishop, she's a witch too.

Suddenly forced into a centuries-old war between witches and sorcerers, Indie's about to uncover the many dark truths about her life -- and a future unlike any she ever imagined on top of the cheer pyramid.

Review

     This book started out weird, but it had some potential.  The main character, Indigo "Indie" Blackwood, is a beautiful, popular high school cheerleader.  Her biggest problem right now is her competitive frenemy Bianca, who may or may not be attempting to steal Indie's hot footballer boyfriend, Devon.  So when some guy seemingly kills himself and Indie witnesses it, things begin to fall out of wack.  He's holding a paper with the address of Indie's family occult shop on it.  But it doesn't mean anything, right?  Then the family Bible is stolen, and it's up to Indie to retrieve it before there are horrific consequences - like end of the world-type consequences!  It turns out that the Bible holds the key to killing witches, and the sorcerers they are at war with would like nothing more than to unlock the secrets.  Since Indie is apparently a witch, it could be her own life on the line.  With the help of Bishop, a hot and mysterious member of "the Family" (the main Witch community heads of power), and her nerdy neighbor Paige, it's up to Indie to save what's left of her family, her own life and the rest of her race.  Can the three of them do it before it's too late?

     Obvious issues with it, but it doesn't sound like it could be all that bad, right?  WRONG!!!  What starts out with the basic threads to lead into a coherent and more detailed plot, devolves into a complete and total train wreck.  Indie herself displays almost constant stupidity after finding out about the reality of magic, witches and the evil sorcerers after the family Bible and by association, her.  She keeps rushing headlong into dangerous and intense situations, under the guise of stubbornness when really she's just too dumb to reason out a better solution.  Both of the guys Indie is involved with are sexist, asshole pigs.  Devon cheats on her with her "best" friend Bianca, and then has the gall to ask her to go to Homecoming with him, just because they already had plans!  And Bishop, the "mysterious" bad-boy type, is a dickwad to Indie.  He basically talks circles around her, neglects to actually explain anything about being a witch and makes fun of her at every opportunity he gets (for being a cheerleader, her clothes, the way she talks, even the girl her boyfriend chooses over her).  And this d-bag is someone I'm supposed to like?  Not mention his tattoo of naked Betty Boop on his neck.  What a f**king pervert.  The love triangle later on with a girl named JEZEBEL (yes, you read that right! NO SUBTLETY!) just worsens my opinion of all these characters, if you can even call them that.

      The battles with the sorcerer henchmen are a pathetic cluster fuck, and even the scene when SPOILER Indie's mom is put into a movie screen and killed by a savage tiger SPOILER was more of a WTF confusion moment than anything else.  The mythology of the witches was convoluted and attempted some genealogical, DNA explanation that made about zero sense to me (not that I'm all that scientifically knowledgeable - but my 10th grade Bio education calls bullshit on this one).  Also, the revelations about her Mom's witch status and her irresponsible Aunt Penny's, made no sense in the context they were used.  The fact of what Aunt Penny was hiding made no sense - unless she's evil.  Probably what will happen in the next book.  Not to mention, "Hey guys, I know you've been looking for the SPESHUL BIBLE THINGY but it's an EFFING DECOY!!!  The only character I didn't want to drop kick in this book was Paige, who was way too nice to Indie, who was obviously using her for her own gain.  And also, a fucking Jay-Z concert?  Why not just a freaking dinner-movie date?  Or something that was, y'know, in the realm of actual believability?  I'm going to stop here, although the scenes with the magic and their pitiful plotting and description (i.e. next to none) take the cake.  I am only marking this as high as I am because of the fact that I finished it.  Won't be torturing myself further.

VERDICT:  1/5  Stars

**I  received this book from Delacorte Books, on NetGalley.  No favors or money were exchanged for this review.  This book was published June 10th, 2014.**

We Cannot Make Amends

Expected Publication:  May 13th, 2014

Broken Hearts, Fences, and Other Things to Mend (Broken Hearts and Revenge #1)

By: Katie Finn

Feiwel and Friends

ISBN-13:  9781250045249

Summer, boys, and friendships gone sour.  This new series has everything that perfect beach reads are made of!

Gemma just got dumped and is devastated.  She finds herself back in the Hamptons for the summer -- which puts her at risk of bumping into Hallie, her former best friend that she wronged five years earlier.  Do people hold grudges that long?

When a small case of mistaken identity causes everyone, including Hallie and her dreamy brother Josh, to think she's someone else, Gemma decides to go along with it.  

Gemma's plan is working (she's finding it kind of hard to resist Josh), but she's finding herself in embarrasing situations (how could a bathing suit fall apart like that?!).  Is it coincidence, or is someone trying to expose her true identity?  And how will Josh react if he finds out who she is?

Review

     Gemma has been going out with Teddy for almost two years now.  She thinks they have the perfect relationship - so imagine her surprise when he dumps her in the candle aisle at Target.  And when she sees him less than a week later, and he's already with some other girl.  Her best friend Sophie is trying to pull her out of her funk, but things only get worse when Gemma has to spend the summer with her Dad in the Hamptons.  She hasn't been back there in five years, and doesn't want to go back now - especially after the horrible way she betrayed her (then) summer-best-friend Hallie.  So Gemma is not excited to go back, at all.  Then she meets Hallie's brother Josh, who mistakes her for someone else due to her new short, red hair and the name on her coffee being that of Sophie, and he introduces her to Hallie that way.  Gemma thinks she's been given a chance by the Universe to start over and make amends for all the wrongs she committed.  Instead it seems like the universe is out to get her and karma is getting its revenge, when nothing goes right (how was she supposed to know that bathing suit would fall apart?!).  But are things really as simple as that, or is there something more sinister behind all Gemma's mishaps...say, a little revenge?

     I will be honest - I read the first thirty percent or so of this book, and after that spent most of it skimming.  This book was extremely shallow.  I knew right when Gemma's bathing suit fell apart in the swimming pool (after she borrowed it from Hallie, who embarrassed her by telling her to dress formal to a pool party), that Hallie was behind it.  I mean seriously, like no one is going to recognize Gemma just because she dyed and cut her hair?  Yeah, right.  The whole thing with Josh was annoying because the first part of the book is all about how devastated Gemma was by the break up with Teddy and then the next thing you know, she's lusting after (and half in love with) Josh.  Honestly, the whole time I was reading this it felt like a Gossip Girl wannabe.  It had a bit more likeability and relatability to it than that, but at its core it was a shallow, revenge centered piece of fluff.  I was disappointed because it did show some moments of heart, especially in the scenes between Sophie and Gemma.  But I think Gemma stealing Sophie's identity kind of axed that out.  Overall, I majorly disliked it and didn't really find anything worthwhile in it.  Won't be reading the next one.

VERDICT:  1/5  Stars

*I received this book as part of Around the World ARC Tours, run by the lovely Princess Bookie.  No favors or money were exchanged for this review.  This book was published May 13th, 2014.*

Side Effects of a Serious Attitude

Expected Publication:  March 18th, 2014

Side Effects May Vary

By: Julie Murphy

Balzer + Bray

ISBN-13:  9780062245359

What if you'd been living your life as if you were dying - only to find out that you had your whole future ahead of you?

When sixteen-year-old Alice is diagnosed with leukemia, her prognosis is grim.  To maximize the time she does have, she vows to spend her final months righting wrongs -- however she sees fit.  She convinces her friend Harvey, who she knows has always had feelings for her, to help her with a crazy bucket list that's as much about revenge (humiliating her ex-boyfriend and getting back at her arch nemesis) as it is about hope (doing something unexpectedly kind for a stranger and reliving some childhood memories).  But just when Alice's scores are settled, she goes into remission.

Now Alice is forced to face the consequences of all that she's said and done, as well as her true feelings for Harvey.  But has she done irreparable damage to the people around her, and to the one person who matters most?

Review

     I am always reluctant to read books about kids or teens with cancer.  Just because I feel like it's very difficult subjecr matter and the author usually devolves into something overly maudlin and sappy - like a Nicholas Sparks book or something!  That said, I think the only one I've ever read that really touched me and came across realistically was The Probability of Miracles by Wendy Wunder.  I enjoyed The Fault In Our Stars the first time I read it, but it didn't hold up very well upon further re-reads.  So I was apprehensive to see what direction that Julie Murphy would decide to take.  It was already different in the fact that the main character, Alice, starts the book off by going into remission.  So when the readers are introduced to her, Alice has been told that she is going to live after all.  Except she's not happy about it as you would expect her to be.  Because she just spent what she thought were the last months of her life, doing whatever the hell she wanted and getting revenge on the people that hurt her in the past.  Now she has to deal with her feelings for her friend Harvey, the mean things she did to her ballet rival and ex-boyfriend, and the fact that she saw her Mom cheating on her Dad right before she got cancer.

     I enjoyed the alternating between the present time and the time before/during when Alice had cancer.  It gave more of an insight into her complicated friendship with Harvey and the reasons for the things she had on her bucket list.  I feel like one of the biggest problems I had with this book was that Alice was an irredeemable bitch for almost the entire thing.  We get to see her POV and Harvey's, but whereas I ended up rooting for Harvey and sympathizing with him, I just wanted Alice to get some help or something.  Harvey was her best friend all throughout their childhood (their parents were good friends) but she dropped him when they entered high school, without a second thought.  Then when Alice is diagnosed with cancer, she takes Harvey back into her life, mostly so that she can use him to help her complete her buckt list/revenge on other people.  Harvey knows that she's just using him, but the poor guy spends almost the entire book trying his hardest to find any sort of redeeming quality in her to make up for her just plain mean and awful behavior.

     Alice on the other hand, is totally unexplainable other than to say that she probably has some kind of personality disorder or something.  She acts downright evil to people, even ones who do nothing but take care of her and try to make her life pleasant.  One major example of this is when she goes into remission, pretty much after admitting to Harvey she loves him, and ditches him again.  Instead Alice starts to go after Eric, the new guy in school.  She kind of likes him, but it seems like she's mostly just doing it to make Harvey jealous and hurt him.  She wants him to be there for her when it's convenient, but Alice will do anything possible to make Harvey feel expendable and refuses to admit anything to him now that she's stuck being alive.  I was really happy that shortly before the end Harvey stopped making excuses for her and kind of just gave up on redeeming Alice in any way.  So of course, in the last 2% of the book, Alice decided to become a better person and try to win Harvey back.  That said, there were some major emotions in this book and reading Alice's POV you can tell that she really doesn't want to be this way and doesn't know why she is.  So I still managed to enjoy the what-if aspects, even if this book has somewhat of a vindictive nature for my tastes personally.  Overall, a good read that makes you really think about life and the people in it.  Not recommended for people who can't stand truly mean characters though.

VERDICT:  3.5/5  Stars

*I received this book as part of Around the World ARC Tours, run by the lovely Princess Bookie.  No favors or money were exchanged for this review.  This book's expected publication date is March 18th, 2014.*